I saw Dr Godwin yesterday to review my medication, particularly the ongoing level of gabapentin. I explained my desire to get myself off of tramadol as soon as I can, and she has suggested increasing the morning dose of gabapentin to 600mg (same as the evening) and then to try stopping the evening tramadol. If I can’t sleep due to increased pain, then perhaps restart the evening tramadol but stop the morning dose. If either option seems ok for a a few days to a week, then we can consider stopping the tramadol completely. She said increasing the afternoon gabapentin to 600mg was an option as well, as that still only takes me to half the maximum daily dose.
Dr Godwin asked about how I was getting on generally, and I explained how I’d been. She asked if I got depressed to which I said I didn’t think so – yes it gets me down sometimes, particularly when I have a bad day overall, or when I set my mind to do things around the house for example, and forget how I’m not going to be able to do things, or will take significantly longer to do things than I used to – but I don’t think it gets me depressed. She also asked if I had thought about reducing my hours etc. I said I didn’t see the point in doing that, as my job would still be the same, needing more hours than I’m contracted for as per now, and I’d just end up doing not many fewer hours for significantly less money. We talked briefly about taking early retirement, but I said that, financial considerations aside, I don’t think I’m any where near ready to consider that, as I don’t know what I’d do with myself, and might actually end up giving in to my condition. I pointed out that I do actually really enjoy my job – as stressful and demanding as it is. She then asked if I wanted a sick note for a while. I have to say this came as quite a shock as I hadn’t even considered whether I was actually fit for work. I’ve been saying to Cat that I need to book some leave, and to an extent that is because I do feel I need some time to recharge the batteries, and do some things at home I’m too knackered to do at weekends, but it came about more because I became aware I’ve got the equivalent of 5 weeks leave to take by March. Anyway, we concluded that I am probably fit enough for work (as long as I’m sensible) but to let her know if I feel that changes. Cat and I had already pencilled in some time off between now and the new year, so I must make sure I find time to book those at work.